there should be tighter control over fast food, drug and alcohol trade. to what extent do you agree?

It is true that these days people have become involved in an argument about fast

food

should be effectively regulated in the same way that the

drug

,

alcohol

and

tobacco

industries are being put into effect. From my point of view, fast

food

does not need to be largely tightened

such

harsh restrictions on that reasons.

First

of all, fast

food

does not do so much harm to human as drugs,

alcohol

or

tobacco

such

as you will use junk

food

instead

of home-cooked to save time when you are in

rush

Correct article usage
a rush

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so it plays a vital part in

fast

Add an article
the fast

The noun phrase fast pace seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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pace of life.

Secondly

, it contributes lots of big money to taxes.

Finally

, it is fast

food

chains that provide ample job opportunities,

therefore

, lessen the amount of money wasting on unemployment concerns.

Nevertheless

Add a comma
,Nevertheless

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase Nevertheless. Consider adding a comma.

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junk foods mention health problems

such

as obesity and diabetes so there is no injury that can cause to another person by having a quick meal, while a

drug

addiction can commit

serious

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a serious

The noun phrase serious crime seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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crime

such

as robbery, kidnapping or rape unconsciously.

In addition

, a huge intake of fast

food

can hardly be harmful, which is not the same as

alcohol

,

drug

or

tobacco

, just one glass of wine will possibly lead to a severe accident on road.

I strongly believe that it will be more beneficial if the government keep the

fast

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fast-food

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food

industries under

a

Correct article usage
apply

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less strict control than the other sectors including

drug

,

tobacco

and

alcohol

.

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